CHRISTMAS PAST

The other day Donna Marie asked on facebook to share a memorable Christmas we could remember as a child. I was amazed at how I remember having the Mumps one Christmas when I was about eitght or nine years old. I hadn't thought about that Christmas in a hundred years, lol. Once I thought about that Christmas other Christmases rushed though my mind. I thought about gifts I had recieved over the years especially those when I was a child. I really loved tea sets as a little girl. I would get one almost ever year. I would sit with my dolls and pretend play I was having tea with them. That's funny when I think back on that because I just love tea. There were other toys that I thought about that bought back fund memories. The year we all got an organ I was going to learn how to play that instrument if it meant teaching myself. That never happen, my brother Greg. was pretty good at teaching himself. I believe he played the wedding song on that organ when my sister got married in the house.

Christmas was fun as a child. Waiting for that time to run down the stairs and look for my gift and pull out the gifts that was under the tree. NOw that I think back on that time I have to say I am amazed at how my parents were able to make that happen for us seeing that it was so many of us. We would all get a gift. We did get the Good Felllow bags too. Those white panties and socks I would get and the candy in the little square box that we ate right away. It helped to make for a wonderful Christmas year after year. I remember taking the Good Fellow applications home a month before the holiday and helping my mother fill out the information for me to take back to school. It was funny returning to school and seeing so many kids with those same pair of socks or scraf and hat set.

Then I thought about the Christmases I had with Kirk while he was coming up. Our first Christmas alone and some organization knocking on my door Christmas Eve night with boxes of food, and some toys for Kirk. The gift of the Holly Hobbie because I wanted him to not think that a toy was for just a boy or a girl that it shouldn't matter that he should appreciate the differences. He liked it cooked on it a couple of times too. Pat and I would just over due it with the toys each year. I felt bad that he didn't have a sibling at home to compare gifts with. His firends would come over as soon as the sun would come up and play with him.

Oh and the Christmases at Christ Child House both in the early days when we had girls and boys and when it was just boys. The kids would all get new clothes and a teddy bear that the midnight staff would put in their rooms at night. I have to say I did like doing that when I worked the midnight shift. I felt like Santa's Helper when I had to put them out. One Christmas really sticks out when I was the superviser and on Christmas Eve we sung Christmas songs and read the Bible before they went to bed. The boys even said that was their best Christmas. Then watching them ripping opening their gifts paper flying all over the place. Scream of "my look what I got" and even tears of disappointment. Those were cool Christmases.

Christmas is a very special time of the year I'm glad we celebrate the birth of Christ. I think the exchanging of gifts is very nice. I still don't quite get where we get that from seeing God gave His Son but we didn't give Him anything in return. Maybe it's the Three Wise men that started it all. I do like Christmas. I thought about going to a Catholic Mass service this year. They just do a great job of celebrating Christmas I think.

Christmas is a beautiful celebration. Maybe this year I have another wonderful memory to store in the Christmas day slot of my mind. Merry Christmas everyone.

smile

SOMEBODY CALL THE DOCTOR

For the last couple of months I haven't been feeling well and I could never really figure out what was wrong. The first rash outburst I knew it was more I even got sicker taking the medication. I kept getting this sick feeling it would come and go. I thougt it feels like something is going on in my system and I don't have a clue of what it could be. Every time a rash would come I would get this sick feelings that something is wrong but what could it be.

Then a week ago another rash this time on my chest and neck. That really scared me because I really don't want to have a rash on my face you know this beautiful face of mine. What else to do but go and see a doctor right. I was happy to get some medication anything to take the rash away. Still I felt that there was something more going on with me but still I couldn't diagnoise myself.

Call the doctor I did. I took myself back to the doctor this time hoping that she could just tell me right there and then what the problem would be. Although I've wanted and knew something was wrong I wasn't prepared to hear those words @#%^& I didn't want to believe it but I didn't want her to repeat that word. Come in and we'll do more test and just to be sure.

Now what does this mean for me? Why are you asking me I'm not a doctor. We will find out sound enough right. Think positive and thank God for the doctor. Maybe now I can get to the bottom of way I haven't been feeling well these last few months.

The doctor is in the house.

WRDT 650 AM

On the radio. I was on the radio. I was surprised this morning with a phone call from Sandra from WRDT650 am radio station that I was going live today on her talk show. I couldn't dress fast enough rushing to work and texting as many people as I could to tell them to listen to me this morning on the radio. Now that's totally awesome.

I was giving the opportunity to talk about the show "Bag Lady" and how it all came about for me. Believe it or not I've been praciting for a couple of months what I would say if I did have a interview on the radio. Oh it was just the way I practiced it. I enjoyed sharing with others the wonderful experienced I had creating my show. It was awesome to tell about the miracle of my healing right from meeting Laura Jannika (Creative Memories) to going to Adventures in Excellence weekend. All those events that lead me to the woman I am today. It took all those experienced and meeting all those wonderful people that lead me to see the gift of writing and performing. As much as I wanted to write my heart could not lead me to write. Working with Donna Marie from Dealwithstresstoday.com I was able to let go of those emotions that had kept me frozen and I was not able to go deep within and heart and write from my heart.

I worked with Donna and I also was able to have the pleasure of going to Adventures In Excellence self development weekend and continue that healling process. Though that experience I was able to find my purpose in life which steered me in the directions of my heart to perform my one woman show. This has been a wonderful journey for me going from a woman that lived in my own pain to a woman that's on the radio. LIfe is filled with miracles and I've experienced my own miracle of emotional healing.

This was awesome sharing my story to the radio land. I hope you were able to hear me this morning. I'm sorry I wasn't able to tell everyone because I found out just this morning. I have to thank Fawn Reeves, my old, new friend that bought her friend, Rick to see my show last month. Because of him I was able to have this the chance to go on the radio.

You know I'm moving forward I know there's more wonderful and lovely adventures are coming my way. You know today the radio, tommorrow the big screen. Keep in touch and you will see.

GONE TOO SOON

Yesterday I recieved a text message from a coworker telling me that a former student from

Vista Meadows was shot and killed. I stared at the message for a long time not believing what I was reading. Pictures of the young ladies face continued to race though my mind. I could only ask why?

I liked this young lady very much. She would yell at me when I would have to ask her to put her cell phone away, or change her blouse but she would always come back in apologize to me. She would often share her candy with me because she knew I liked candy. I wanted to help young people I wanted to help them steer their lives in the right directions. I wanted to encourage them to go for their dreams. This hurts me so much to see that this young ladies dreams are now gone.

I am sad right now because there are so many young people that are racing to be in control of their lives that they're making some very dangerous choices and they're lives are being either taken too soon or imprisoning them. I continue to ask the questions why?

I remember when I was Micah's age I was a young mother. I was scared for my future and had lost my dream so many years before I didn't know how to dream. I was told at Micah's age that I was going to graduate from school that January. I didn't know what to do. The day I was told I could be in full control of my life I wanted to start all over I wanted another chance to do it right. I had to begin to think of my future I decided to go to college. Micah can't make that decisions now she's gone too soon.

As I sit here and write this the tears are forming in my eyes and I don't want to cry. I couldn't help Micah sometimes I feel like I can't help any of these young people. I watched a young man at work yesterday stand and talk about his goals for the future he stood there with prison orange on and talked about wanting to turn his life around and make something good of his life. Can he do that, yes he can. I want to believe that for him but I know it will take hard work to make it happen.

Will he leave one day too soon?

I think of Anne Frank a teenager that had so much promise and a dream that just wasn't going to go away. She left this planet too soon but her dream lives on forevery. Our young people are fighting a war that does not have to be fought. They are living their young lives as if they were in Germany waiting for someone to come and take their lives away. This does not have to be. All the drugs, sex, alocohol, money in the world is not worth this. This does not have to be. Our young people do not believe that because some where we are giving them the impressions that those things are the most important things in life. The truht is they are the most important people in our lives.

I have no answer to my questions of why. I can have hope that one day I can help a teenager see that they are of value to this world. Now I have to go and cry.

IS THERE A PREACHER IN THE HOUSE

Trust in the Lord with all thy heart and lean not unto thy own understanding in all thy way acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy path. Proverb 3: 5 - 6

Pastor Kenny Hampton Jr. is now the pastor of Bethany Pembroke Chapel. This has always been a dream for my friend Kenny to be a pastor of a church.

A devoted man to the gospel of Christ has always had a desire to be a minister of a church. He had a very good example in his father, Pastor Kenneth Hampton Sr. of Grace Bible Chapel. I am so happy for him as he will be in my prayers as he moves forward in his dream.

Continue to trust in the Lord Kenny as you serve as pastor to the members of Bethany Pembroke Chapel. If you're looking for a church home go check out my friend, Kenny Hampton, at Bethany Chapel located at 19901 Burt Road in Detroit.

BUCKET LIST

This is my friend, Diana I'm so proud of her. A couple years ago we made a bucket list of all our dreams, we were in a self development course together. She put on her list to learn how to play the violin. Well look at my girl she got one for her birthday and immediately began her lesson. She played the scale for us it was so pretty.

Do you have a list of dreams you would like to see come true for you? Write them all down we had to come up with 100. Then put them away you'll be surprised at how your dreams can come true for you. "All men dream but not equally. Those who dream at night in the dusty recesses of their minds, wake in the day to find it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangeroues

wo(men), for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible. " T.E. Lawrence

Tell me are you just a night sleeper or one with open eyes going forward and making your dreams a reality? I am in awe of my friends dream she's living it. Wake-up and make your dreams come true it's time to live.

I'm Grateful For

I'm grateful for life, friends, family, job, health, laughter, money, education, books, movies, animals, USA, Africa, sports, confidante, music, art, writing, clowns, and so much more. I'm grateful that I had the experience of this year. I good year it was nothing exciting and nothing awful isn't that cool.

I'm very thankful for my son, Kirk. He's such a loving young man and I'm so grateful for that. I'm grateful for his daughter, Kaylan. I still miss her very much. I think about her a lot wondering how are things going for her in her first year in high school. She'll be fourteen this year that really amaze me. I hope she loves school and that she continues to do well in school she's such a smart girl.

I'm grateful for my job. I got a new job this year. It wasn't easy working at Vista Meadows. Teenagers are such a challenge and I didn't have the skills to work with them. I'm grateful for the new job it's a challenge too. I work in at ACE Academy in Highland Park in their after school program. I'm respondsable for the program making sure things are running well with the program. This is a very big challenge for me as I never imgained working in an office and there I seat everyday working on the attendance. Sometimes I feel like calling up my superviser and saying I quit I can't do this. I decided to continue to work at the challenge and learn what I can from the experience. I have to say I don't miss working with the students.

I'm grateful for Fawn this year. What a wonderful new, old friend. She has been such a gift to me this year. I've never imgained when we knew each other thirty years ago that she would be editing my book. I do remember her as a teenager reading books a lot just like I did. I liked her as a teenager because she liked to read I use to think that she was such an intelligent girl and imgained her being a professor when we were kids. Reading her work that she has done for me is just a talented woman. I was really blessed seeing her and all the wonderful work she has done on the book. The woman is awesome.

I'm grateful for still working with Donna Marie. Having her in my life has been such a gift. I've gained so much from working with her the last few years. She has encouraged me, supported me and listened to me. She has helped me changed and grow. This is just amazing at so much I have done since I've worked with her. I don't even recognized the woman that I've become since I've worked with her. I love it when she laughs with me.

I'm grateful for Laura and her sharing her talents with me over the years. I just think she's so gifted and has such amazing artistic skills. I do appreciate her so willing to help me with my photo albums. I just love looking at them and working on them it is lots of fun. I appreciate how she calls me and ask me to come over and just sit with her and talk. She dreams for me too which is so cool she wants me to reach all my dreams. She's a cool friend indeed.

I'm grateful for many friends Johanne, Diana, Cathy, Jennifer. It's been so cool spending time with them. I like going over to Canada and spending time with Diana and Cathy. They are such talented women when it comes to quilting. I had a wonderful time with Johanne too this where I took the pic on our little vacation. I am thankful for Jennifer and I miss spending time with her.

I'm grateful for my health and home. I forget to be grateful for how this year was good for me with my health. There were a couple of times when I wasn't feeling to good but over all I'm doing well which is a wonderful thing. I am thankful that I'm able to live here with my sister. I get so worked over what it isn't that I forget to be thankful for what it is. My sister is a very sweet woman and I'm glad that we do get along.

As you can see that I just like the sky and the sea there's so much to be thankful for. What a wonderrful time to think about all those things I am thankful for. The skies the limit. smile

SELL OUT

"I'm coming out I want the world to know got to let it show."

I couldn't believe it the show was a sell out. Ever seat in the thearte was filled people had to sit on the stairs to watch the show. A dream come true. What an amazing event. Last night I did the show the Bag Lady again it's been over a year ago since I did it last. I was so amazed that so many people were there more than I could have imgained. I was expecting 80 people to come the thearte holds 130 people there were people sitting on the stairs. A true gift.

I added one new scene with a little girl dancing with another one of the other dancer it summed up the whole show. Actually the little girl stole the show. I found it to be so much more enriching to have her in the show. This was so awesome being able to create something in my mind then seeing it come full force was a wonderful treat. A beautiful gift indeed.

I am so grateful that I was able to do the show again. I think what was so great about the whole experience was being able to greet everyone that was in the audience after the show. My heart was lifted with so many warm words of appreciation. Many said that they were blessed by the show I was blessed by everyones presents. Thank you everyone of you, thank you so much.

Kim

Blessings

smile

m

SHE'S BACK

Bag Lady is back. Today I went to Donna Maria's class at Oakland Community College to talked about my show and book. I talked to the students about having a dream and moving towards that dream what it take to make your dreams come true. Someone asked what did it take for me to get here realizing my dream and making it happen. I had to say it was my self discovery letting go of old emotions that were holding me down. I know if it wasn't for me going deep inside and looking at my past and facing my fears that I wouldn't be here today seeing my dream come true, the book and Bag Lady. This has been one marvelous adventure.

I sold about twenty tickets at the class today and that felt great. I also went to the Y and got a little tour of the stage and thearte. I was in love. The place is beautiful I know that time on stage is going to be fantastic. I will continue to stay in prayer about the show that who ever gets the opportunity to see it will come out ready to let go and move forward.

Bag Lady is back ready to share her story.

IN BETWEEN MY TEARS

The writing fingers writes and haven't written moves on. I don't know who wrote this beautiful saying I do remember who said it to me. Mrs. Miller was a nurse on the Children's ward and she said that to me while I was there. She motivated me with those words. That was over thirty something years ago. I was also giving a diary from Ms. Graves from the same place. Those two women wated a seed that was buried inside of me the seed to write was beginning to sprout.

I've read many books over my life time. Most of the books were about people who had over come obstacle in their lifes to reach their dreams. I read The Diary of Ann Frank, Go Ask Alice, Daddy Was a Number Runner, The Story of a Slave Girl, I Know Why The Cage Bird Sings, Coffee Will Make You Black, Soul Brother and Sister Lou and there are many more that I haven't added here but these were stories that inspired me. I read and had a secrect desire to write. The written word just seems to bring me joy. I love seeing words in print. The desire was there but I allowed fear to keep me from going towards that dream.

When I was given my diary at fifteen I was placed at Vista Maria Home for girls. I wanted to write my story about that time at Vista Maria. I tried many times during my adult life. I just couldn't make it work. I would look at line paper and write but would ball up the paper and throw it away. I cried about it over the years. Hoping but never getting anywhere. I couldn't imagine what the book would even look like no least writing it.

Four years ago I met Donna Maira, my confidante and she asked me what did I want for my life. I didn't know what to say then the words write my book came out of my mouth.I was so surprise that those words came out of my mouth. The dream was there because the seed was planted so many years ago. I've worked very hard on my inner self letting go of old emotions that have held me back I began to write. The joy returned. I met Marilyn a writer's coach on line. She encouraged me to write my story and the words just flowed right though me as if someone had turned on the water faucet. This is how In Between My Tears came to me. I am almost there now. I am closer than I've ever been. I've been blessed with a new editor an old friend I had when I was a young girl at Vista Maria, Fawn Reeves.

We are looking forward to having the book published by the January of next year. I am so happy about this. This is so exciting for me. The seed was watered and now it has bloomed. I see it come to an end. The writing finger writes and haven't written moves on.

IT'S TIME TO MAKE A CHANGE

Something fell on me today it was light I should have expected it to happen but yet I wasn't ready for it. It was soft and gentle almost like a feather it's color bought a smile to my face. I loved the sight of it. It was a leaf to let me know that it was time to make a change.

Life has it's changes sometimes unexpected and often not. I had several changes in my life the last few years. There were times when I didn't think my life could be any different and then the change. I have a new job now working in a lock up facility for teenage boys. It's a little scary for me being in a place that's surrounded by young men that have commented some type of crime. I have to get use to working though heavy steel doors that can only be open from someone watching from cameras. It makes me cry to see so many African American males behind locked doors. This is such a change for me as I have worked with young boys for over twenty years and they got to play outside no steel doors to go though. I have prayed for years that this wouldn't be their destination one day. A never would want this to be a change for them.

Life is like a leaf that changes so suddenly that you're not really aware of the change. My hope is that I will not work in a place like this for very long. I would like to be an encourager to the young men that I meet there but hope that a change that would bring a much pleasant change for me one day.

Look out for the leaves that this fall.

Workcation and Vacation Awesome

The last two weeks has been a wonderful and delightful experience for me. I've had a wonderful opportunity to see Michigan in a new way. I had the chance to go to Traverse City and Indian City the last two weels and I was thrilled to see the beauty of our state. Both places were just filled with beauty. In Traverse City I had the opportumity to see such lovely landscrapes of green trees, blue skies and lovely vineyards. I was in awe of the beauty of it all. My superviser (friend) and I drove around and visited two vineyards and tasted some delicious wine. We also visited a old store the kind I use to see when I was a child down south. We stopped and had fresh rootbeer soda. That was cool, I don't like root beer but I couldn't pass that up. The best part was discovering Mooners ice cream. We happend to stop on the side of the road to get vegatables (that was cool too.) and he suggested we try the best tasting ice cream in America. We really thought he was giving us a suckers job with that line. When we taste it wenwere sold so we spent the last day hunting down for the diary to purchase more. I bought a half quart home. I can continue to enjoy it.

On friday my friend, Johanne had invited me to come to visit her up in her cabin in Indiana City. We had arranged this before I went on my workcation. Her place first of all is just beautiful. I could live in this place I thought it was going to be some small little log cabin. I was so wrong. She took me to Mackinac Island. I haven't been there in over thrity years. That's if you could believe I'm old enough to say that. I had forgotten how beautiful it was. The water just took my breath away. The bridge wow so long. I was glad we took a boat over so that I could really see how long the bridge was. We walked around for a while then took a carriage ride. I'm glad we didn't go with the bike ride. The ride was just great. All I could think about were the Indiana that once lived on this land. The trees were long and big. Oh my it was such a wonderful site to see. We went inside of a small house with butterfilies. This is when I wanted to just plant my feet and sit down and stay forever. I loved every minute of being there. I nearly cried just watching those beautiful creatures fly.

I totally enjoyed the company of my friend as we walked around for a short time I was snapping pictures left to right hoping to capture the moment. I found what love really meant just by spending time here and in Traverse City because God is just awesome, man (smile) He really is. He really knows how to decorate.

What a wonderful workcation and vacation I had these last two weeks.

smile

ONE IS THE LONELINESS NUMBER

Today I'd cried tears of loneliness. Tears of sadness too. I'd cried because I find myself alone and very blue. I'd spend my days dreaming of dancing with someone arm and arm. I've dreamed of someone sharing all their ups and downs. I realized that its only a dream not reality at all. My life exist without a love and there are times when I get down.

I'm not sure where that poem came from. I just know that today I feel so bad because I've lived all my life without anyone special in my life. I've watched others walk around holding hands and embracing one another with love. I've seen so many marriages that I'm able to recite the vows. Yet, my whole life at 52 has never felt that love for anyone new.

I've dreamed of many things for my life but afraid to dream of loving someone with all my heart. LIfe is grand isn't it. Some people are able to go full force and try to walk against the wind. I to afraid that a storm may come and blow me a cross a field.

Today I'd cried.

Number one that's me.

THE GOOD OLE' DAYS

I've often wondered about her. Where

did she go? Did she move out of state? There was a time when I would remember her birthday, August 2. Not only her but most of the girls that I shared my teen years with. We wern't innocent girls to say the least. Most of us were there for tranucy, run away, and some type of tramua in our lives. None of us really volunteered to go there.

We shareed everything our scrects that we wouldn't share with our therapist or parents. We shared our dreams for the future. Most of us didn't see a good fortune for ourselves we were bound to bad luck for the rest of our lives. We promised to keep in touch after we left. We were going to be friends for life. Our pain had developed a bound we felt could never be broken.

Then life happen and we did break the bound. I'd spend days looking though white pages. I would look at stranger straight in the face hoping that one day I would run into one of my best friends. One day I did going right into a gas station just as I opened the door there was Wanda. We hugged of course and asked quick questions then we went on our way. The bound had been broken.

I've always thought about Fawn because she was one of he youngest of us, two and a half years that is. She was so much more mature for her age. I enjoyed talking to her she had such great phioloshy about life. She talked about religion, race issues and her best topic was men. I just enjoyed every moment with her. Then life happen and the bound broke.

I shared that she looked me up just as I was looking her up. What a bound we had we with other. Our vibes were kicking over time. I had the chance to visit with her again. We talked about the good ole' days and the not so good days. We talked about our jobs, money and relationship. We talked about the dreams we hadn't fulfilled or fulfilled and we talked about what we hope to see ourselves doing in the future. It was like old times. She did have some very deep things to say. I had to reminded her of that just like we did when we were younger. We didn't want to start crying in front of her husband you know.

Friendship are true miracles in our lifes. I think I realize that now connecting with Fawn. She was there for me just when I needed her the most. Again we'd promised what we'd stay in touch this time. "Friends forever." Blowing kisses at each other just like we you to. The bound is mending.

Welcome back Fawn

I REMEMBER YOU

Yesterday I open my Facebook account and there was a message from a very old friend of mine. I don't like using the word "old" but the reality is that we are. I couldn 't believe my eyes when I saw her name in my email. She asked if I remember her. I do. I often wonder if old friends think about me like I think about them. What a great feeling to see a friend that was so special to me want to hear from me. I can't wait to meet up with her and see how life has been treating her.

I"d learned this poem back during the time when she and I were friends and when I saw her name I thought of it.

Friend I will remember you think of you and I will pray for you and when another day is though I'll still be friends with you.

This picture is the door to Vista Maria where I knew this friend from. Wow!

Welcome back friend.

TAKING A RISK

I took a risk this month and entered an contest to try to win fee rent in a nice apartment near downtown Detroit. I did because my good friend asked me to do it and I thought oh what the reck it wouldn't hurt. It was fun running around Detroit and taking snapshots of places that I like about my home town. I even enjoyed looking at the other contestants video, people are so creative. What was very interesting about this was I took a risk.and allowed myself to step from out of the fear of not being pretty enough or smart enough and went with I want to enjoy my life and have fun. I want to enjoy every moment of the day. I did it and had a great time doing it. It was a joy to see my girlfriend's son do what he enjoy doing to,fliming. It was fun stepping out of the box. I read a book last year titled "Anyway" I was afraid but I did it anyway. Go Me!
The young lady that won was great!

May day is coming for my true dream to come true.

Smile

IN BETWEEN MY TEARS MOVING FORWARD

I have a dream. Those famous words that moved a nations many years ago rings true in my heart today. I too have a dream a dream that was in bedded in my heart over thiry something years ago. I wanted to write a book I wanted to tell my story. My dream I believe is coming true. This dream have been eating inside of my soul and wanting badly to expand and grow. I am working towards that dream coming true.
"The tragedy in life doesn't lie in not reaching your goal. The tragedy lies in having no goal to reach. " Benjamin Mays Writing my book has been my goal the tragedy was sitting on that dream and not moving forward. I have awaken and the burning in my soul scream to go forward and make my dream come true. I shall. The dream moves forward, its my time to shine.

What dream are you sitting on?

smile

DREAM MOVING FORWARD

On tuesday of this week I spoke with a movie director on the possibities of making the one woman show Bag Lady into a made for television movie. My dream came true to speak someone about the show. I couldn't believe it, the experience it was awesome as we sat there and he asked questions and my insides leaped with joy. I could feel my whole being fill with excitement. I felt the room move in ward as if it had closed in on us. He asked "who would you like to play you in a movie?" My heart moved to my throat. "Yes, I do. Kimberly Elise." It felt so good to be able to say her name as I had just saw her in a movie a week ago.

Her performance was dynamic I thought then that she was a great actress she should play me in my movie. I was shocked that I was actually saying her name at the meeting.

I lived my dream of sitting with someone and talking about making the show a movie. I was thrilled. I believe that this is only the beginning its going to move even further. I see myself on television and even in a book. I know this is going to happen. My dream is moving forward

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

I will celebrate Mother's day thanking my son, Kirk for allowing me to be his mother. Kirk gave me such a gift when he became a part of my life. He blessed me with the honor of caring for him. He changed my life tremendously. I think back on the years gone by and how he patiently watched me grow. Those years when I was learning how to be a woman and a mother he never turned his back on me. It wasn't easy for him to see me drepressed and often confused about how to support him.

I loved having him in my life. He made me laugh and their were times when I was so frustrated with him. He didn't understand a lot about his life and why was I raising him alone. He was hurt so many times by both his parents. Yet, Kirk never stopped loving me.

Kirk was a very special gift to me. I am so honored that he was my son. I love him so much. When I'm with him I feel like a queen. He gave me dancing lessons one year and I just felt like a real ballerina when he would twirl me around. I was so blessed to have him as my son.

I thank my son for allowing me to share his life with me. I thank him for loving me though all my sadness, insecurities and doubts about myself. I am so grateful that he chose me as his mother.

On this Mother's day when we honor mothers I honor my son.

I love you Kirk. Thanks for being such a lovely son

AS TIME GOES BY

My granddaughter, Kaylan is growing up. She turned the big 13 in December is what a delight to go and visit her on her birthday. She not that little girl anymore. I still can't believe that she'll be off to high school this coming school year.

This school year she enter two beauty pagents and won. I know that must meant the world to her. I am very happy to see her grow into a young lady. My Pooh baby is now a little lady.

Time goes on.

MAKING A DREAM COME TRUE

In my twenties I've dreamed of writing a book. I didn't think that dream would ever come true because I didn't have enough faith in myself. I put that thought away but yet the desired weighted heavily inside my soul.

Three years ago I meet a writers coach and she encouraged me to write. I wrote it felt as if my soul just open up and every thing just rolled out of me. I wrote sometimes until the middle of the night. I was seeing my dream come true.

My writer's coach and I haven't worked together in over a year now. I feel the tears of saddness beginning to well up inside. My dream is struck and my soul is crying out for help.

Please somebody help me.

SMELL THE ROSES

Have you stopped to smell the roses? I just love that saying something that many of us do not do. We're so busy with our day to day lives and often filled with worries of what tommorrow may bring that we don't stop and smell the roses.

Those roses can come in so many shapes and sizes like your child giving you a hug, or a friend just calling to say hello. So many things are really our roses that we forget to just embrace those moments.

There are times when we have to take a moment out of our day and just reflect on all the many roses we do have. The gift of a job, a car or a home to live in. Those are roses too.

We can stop and admire the beauty of our world the trees, birds. I heard birds chriping this morning when I went to work. I didn't feel like going then I heard the birds. Wow what beauty it was.

I hope you take a moment and stop and smell the roses and what ever shape they make come in. They're such a beautiful thing to enjoy. Hmmmm smell good.

smile

BELIEVE IN THE DREAM

On saturday I took a big leap of faith because I believe that the show Bag Lady should be a movie. My confidante informed me of an organization that was having a show downtown to raise money for Haiti relief. I went to support it and with the hopes that I could pass my DVD to the leader of the organization. I step out of my fears and went. I was able to meet them and I gave them the DVD. He's holding it in his hand at the end of the show. I have to believe in the dream. Believe with me.

smile