What Will Be Will Be

I remember hearing this song when I was a little girl. I didn't really understand it as a child by now at 65 I totally get. I didn't ask my mother what I will be. I just knew I was going to grow up and be this super cool and fun teacher. I was going to do that until I retired. Then I dreamed about being other things too, an actress, a writer. My mind would go on and on about what I thought I wanted to be. 

ere's what she said to me

"Que será, será

Whatever will be, will be

The future's not ours to see

Que será, será

What will be, will be"

I did teach for a while. That was super cool, fun and frustrating. I didn't have a degree in education but lots of experience working with children. I think I wasn't confident in my abilities as a teacher, and I let it go. That's what it was

I did do my own one woman show. Now that was super, super cool. Being on that stage and performing as myself was surreal. I couldn't believe I was actually on that stage. I remember doing a play when I was younger with the church that was pretty awesome too. I don't know why I didn't pursue that. Probably allowing fear to be my guide instead of. walking in faith. That's what it was.

I do now have brought me so much joy. I do enjoy seeing the boys trying to maintain and learn in school although they're going through some very difficult times in their lives. I can relate to their experiences because of my own but it still hurts seeing them having to experience not being with their families. It tickles me when they call me "grandma" or say that they're glad I'm there for them. It's a blessing and a joy to just encourage them and try my best to help them succeed. School is so important, and I know they don't understand it right now. I just don't want them to look back and say no one was there for them to encourage them. I want them to look back and say "Miss Kim" was so helpful. They're important to the world and I want them to know that they really matter. I want them to be left behind. This is what it is. I'm doing what I meant to be. I believe that I will (hope) do this working with the boys, helping them with education until I retire.