Wednesday, April 29, 2020

Back to work

I went back to work with a heavy heart knowing that Myron will never cross those doors again. I was strong and didn’t cry although I really wanted to. I remember the lady time I saw him in the house I wanted to ask him something but he was enjoying himself laughing with staff. I thought I’ll ask him when we come back to work. 
I so enjoyed working with him over the years. 

Saturday, April 25, 2020

Oh Lord in the Morning

I really like that that’s a verse in the Bible in Psalm 5, I love it. Give ear to my cry oh Lord! I’ve been crying out to the Lord every since this began shouting out to Him. I know it’s a cry of fear. I pray that Lord that You will be with us in this time of fear. God has allowed me to see anew morning and many eyes do not open any more. 
I have to go back to work next week grateful for these days home. Grateful that things got taken care of while I was home. 
The sun is shining today even in the sunshine the darkness rides on. 

Thursday, April 23, 2020

The Clouds covering b

The weather has been so dark and dreary which makes being inside so much more harder. The darkness seems to keep me in a little funk which only drags the day. I push through it and tidy up drawers and linen clothes something I’ve never done since I’ve been here. That was a lift. 
Grateful for scrapbooking helps to fuse creativity which I love making cards too. I’m grateful that 

I’m Here

I done know how long it’s been since this all began. The days drag into the next sometimes I’m disappointed when the night falls because I’m going to bed and if God grants me breath I’m back to our world of shut in. I’m doing alright with this situation I don’t mind being in I get a little lonely but I’m doing fine. Having the boys call and reading with me each day they seemed so cooperative and reading better as well. Ms Regina is doing a fabulous joy of organizing a schedule for the boys learning. I know it’s her joy and she has excellent skills and knowledge.  I have to admit grateful I’m not there. I needed a break I hate this situation we’re experiencing in our world just glad to be here and away from all that work entails the interaction with each other. I believe I was drained, overwhelmed and tried. 
This is not what I’ve would have wanted seeing what’s happening in our world the darkness that surrounds us. The sun doesn’t seem like it wants to appear. God has a great plan for the world the cleanses we’re experiencing is just so painful. God asked us to not be fearful to trust in Him believing He knows what’s best for us. This is where my faith has to develop. The Bible says I will keep you in perfect peace if you keep your mind stayed on Me. Keeping my mind on Him trusting that He knows what’s best for me. 

Monday, April 20, 2020

When will This Be Over

A good friend of mine texted me this morning it was literally a few minutes after we had laughed in one text she texted me her good friend had passed away the night before. This madden in an instant it’s over. We’re losing so many people this is just more than anyone have ever imagined. 
Kirk shared with me that the little girl that I’ve been seeing on Facebook that had passed away from complications that stemmed from the virus was a friend of he’s daughter, she was only five the youngest to lose her life from this virus. 
There’s so many stories that people are sharing and crying all over the world. Our Heavenly Father has brought us to our knees. 
Walking around wearing mask and gloves. Every time someone gets close to me I feel myself freezing concerned that they may say thing and the virus will travel to me. A little girl walked passed me she was a distance away actually on the other side of the gate she yells out to me” hi how are today!” I see the joy and excitement and hear it in her voice and the worry ran through my vains. I’ve lost the joy and love for acknowledgment of the other person. This hurt me deep inside that I couldn’t be in that moment and enjoy the love that was given to me from her. 
Shawn called two days ago to say his dear friend Octavia had passed away. She was a very sweet and loving young lady. A gem of a women. An actres, writer, mentor, director and producer she loved every aspect of theater. It was her passion being in the theater it didn’t seem to matter where she just love the arts. She was a very kind person and cheerful. She was always fighting a physical battle but never seemed to lose her zeal for life. I believe that God has her with Him she allowed Him to use her and such a loving way.
A couple weeks ago I watched her whole her first grandchild I was so happy for her knowing what she gave experienced over the years and there she was holding an extension of herself.
Father God I’m screaming out to You! Have mercy on us. My hope is in You, Lord
Our father who art in heaven hallowed it be thine Name, thy kingdom come thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give each day our daily bread and forgive us our traspasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil for thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory. For ever and ever, amen 

Saturday, April 18, 2020

Come Together

There were a protest to against our governor for extending our stay at home. I have a theory why so many wants it lifted. I’m sure there’s people that may not agree with this but it’s the way this virus is being reported that many wants to go back to work. It’s definitely race related many white Americans are hearing that it effects more blacks in our state. Most white people in our state not working side by side with black people they see no reason their community should suffer from closing their area businesses. Their not concern about elderly because they feel they’re going to die anyway and their not a big contributor to the economy so it doesn’t matter. 
We will always be saw as useless in this country no some people don’t want us to come together.   We have to stop breaking things down to race and just look at it as people. As long as we continue reporting black white we’ll never be able to come together. People are dying from all races it doesn’t matter what’s their nationality it’s all about caring for people saving peoples lives. Why are we so heartless? 
A friend of mine posted on Facebook her son performing at their school’s talent show today. No one wore a mask. My friend posted that we’re over reacting to this virus and we need to move forward. I’m so disappointed and hurt believing that she’s one of those who believe this is not their issues. I looked at Myron’s Facebook page and my heart hurts. Too many life’s are taken to early. He has two young boys that’s going to grow up with out him. He loved his boys he worked so hard with them. This didn’t have to be this way. Why did our president have to be so arrogant and uncaring? This is the worst president I’ve ever seen. It really amazes me that others follow him. What a message 

Tuesday, April 14, 2020

What’s today?

For a second I couldn’t remember what was today. I thought it was Wednesday when I couldn’t find my wallet and the days seemed as if they ran together. It’s Tuesday, April 14,2020 and we’re still holding on staying put. My friend, Tarpeh sent an article saying it was 100 years Spanish flu. Amazing that here we are again watching the world change right in front of our eyes. I don’t even want to write about the fear that comes and goes through my mind. I sit in the house turn the television off in just be in the quiet. Life has been moving from one thing to and never being in quiet I’ve got this time and I’m going to enjoy not bugging anyone or they bugging me. I think I longed for that because I was getting a little agitated with dealing with people. This gave me that moment.
The down part is that people have loss their lives, lively hood and so much more. They’re living in fear of what tomorrow may bring. This is horrible! Our president doesn’t make it any easier. I’ll write a